Family Woes

I need to vent for a little while because there are things going on in my life that just make me angry. I am married and have a daughter and my life itself is okay, but I live right next door to my in laws and their problems have become my problems and it is driving me nuts. I have a mother in law who is pretty okay but she can't seem to make any decisions on her own and she is constantly asking my husband to do things to help her. Not that I mind that, by itself. But then I have a brother in law who has a wacky messed up life and it seems little brother is the only one who can fix it for him. Not to mention that he seems to think that I have no life of my own and has absolutely no respect for women in general. Then I have another brother in law who is constantly trying to get big brother involved in his schemes and trying to get him to help with things I could do (even though I'm a girl(stereotype)) like changing his oil or putting new spark plugs in his truck. I mean come on is it really that hard or is he really that lazy. Then on to the next brother in law, this is really the beginning of my problems, not that every thing else doesn't matter, but then this is just icing on the cake for me. My brother in law is rude, there is no nicer way to put it. For starters he will call at dawn to try to get my husband to do something for him, I mean come on people are asleep here and we have already had to talk to him about this, but he still insist on doing it. Then he has no life, I swear he doesn't. He just quit school (he's in 11th grade) so he sits at home all day then goes to work to work from 3:00-5:30. 2 1/2 hours. If you are going to quit school get a real job. Then he will come home from school and for some awful reason feels the need to sit at my house til 10:00-11:00 at night. I have a life I have a family. My daughter has to get in bed at a reasonable hour not stay up all hours of the night. Plus he doesn't leave at all during this time. I don't like to be rude but when I'm hungry I'm ready to eat so I just end up being rude because he will stand right in the door way of the kitchen and watch us eat. Then we have certain T.V. shows that we like to watch and he will sit and watch them with us, which is okay, until he starts talking while the show is on, not during commercials, but actually during the show. I know its probably mean , but I will sit on the couch and as he is talking I will steadily turn the volume up until he gets the hint or until I drown him out. Now for my biggest grievance with him. I know that most of the time I am a softy, and most of the time I am okay with that, but it just really upsets me to even think that somebody might be taking advantage of me. I only have one vehicle and the way my husband works most of the time it is at my disposal. But the other day my brother in law was having problems with his P.O.S. vehicle and he came to me to ask me for a ride to work. Well it just so happens that this week my hubby has been driving to work and when I told him that no I couldn't he started trying to curse me out and to curse my husband out. Now I don't put up with being disrespected in my own home and I almost jumped on him and told him exactly how I feel. The only thing that stopped me was my daughter. I don't know how it is my fault that he doesn't have a ride to work or with the way I am beginning to feel how it is my problem. I am not his mother and he is not my responsibility. I know that probably sounds harsh but I have my own family and my own problems. I don't like having to cart everyone every where just because I don't work. Which brings me to my sister in law (the one and only). She is still in school and she is doing really well. She is involved in all kinds of extra curricular activities. But she is constantly asking to use the computer (They don't have one) and typing papers on it. I don't mind really I don't but it has become an all the time thing. Once or twice a week. I don't remember writing that many papers in school. I wouldn't mind so much if it wasn't all the time, but I do care that she seems to forever be using the computer and PRINTING those papers out. I am not an ink factory and for those of you who have a computer you will understand that printer ink cost the earth for just one tiny little cartridge. I don't want to be mean but I just can't stand that my ink cartridge is empty and I am not printing anything on it. Then she asks me to pick her up from school. Again I am not a taxi. I don't mind every once in a while, but it is an all the time thing. I am not your Mother. I don't think that you should let your kids be involved in any extra curricular activities if you as a parent can not handle toting them to and from these activities. My mom did so why does it seem no one else can. I know that this just seems like a lot of complaining, but I can't help it. I can only deal with so much of everyone else's life before I blow up because I haven't dealt with my own. I thought maybe this would help ease the frustration.

I would really like to know what anybody else thinks about these issues and maybe if you are going through anything similar you can enlighten me on how you deal with it. So post a comment let me know if I am just being Nasty or if I am in the right with how I feel.

It's a New Year and A New Generation

It's been a while since I have posted anything, but so much has been going on. Christmas came and went in a flurry of presents, squeals of delight, and the inevitable family argument. New Years came and went with a good friends fortieth birthday party. So much black it was scary. Now it seems that my little girl has grown over night. My daughter is five years old now and I have to sit back and wonder where did time go. Wasn't she just born yesterday? She is a totally independent little person. It seems she dosen't depend on me as much as she used to. No more crying in the night for mom. No more cuddling with mom, no more does she need me to do every little thing for her. My daughter has become her own person in the blink of an eye. Where did the time go? She will be starting school in August of this year and I know it will probably be more difficult for me then it will her. She will make her own friends, her own intrest, her own world. I think it will make me cry. But you know what I can still remember my school years, suprisingly enough. I can remember my mom being there even when it seemed I didn't need her always standing just in the background waiting until I called. Being at all kinds of school functions, field trips and carting me to many, many, many vollyball and basketball games. She was always there just in the background cheering me on, just waiting for me to call. I want to be that kind of person, I want to be that kind of mom. I want to be able to take a step back and just be there when she needs me. I want to be able to let her go and create her own place in the world. I don't want to constanly wonder if she will be okay or if she is strong enough or smart enough to do it on her own. I just want to be there waiting for when she calls.

I know it is probably a little soon to worry about these sorts of things, but then again she did turn five over night, next time I blink she might be sixteen ;). Scary thought!

That's all for now, time to go. I think I hear my daughter calling.